Frequently Asked Questions
🛒 Orders
Q: How can I check the status of my order?
A: When your order ships, we will send you a shipping notification email with tracking information. Sometimes it takes 24 hours for the tracking number to update your shipment information.
Q: What confirmation e-mail? I didn't get one!
A: If your credit card was charged and you didn't receive an order confirmation e-mail, it is possible you entered the wrong e-mail address. Please contact us with your name, billing address and order number so we can assist you.
🚚 Shipping
Q: How quickly do you ship after I make a purchase?
A: We're on it! Orders are typically shipped the next business day.
Q: Where are you shipping from?
A: Straight out of Ocala, Florida – the heart of nerd and geek territory!
Q: What shipping methods are available?
A: We primarily use the United States Postal Service for all our wizardry and shipments. In some rare instances we may use UPS if available(usually just for very large items or a bulk order).
Q: How long until my treasures arrive?
- USPS Ground Advantage packages usually take 2-5 business days.
- Want it faster? Opt for Priority Mail upgrade at checkout.
- Priority Mail typically reaches you in 2-3 days.
- For our friends in Alaska and Hawaii, please be patient as ground services can be slower.
Q: Can you ship to APO/FPOs and PO Boxes?
A: Absolutely! If USPS can reach it, so can we. Just ensure your address details are accurate.
Q: Do you ship to Puerto Rico, Guam, the Northern Mariana Islands, and the U.S. Virgin Islands?
A: Yes, we do! We're all about spreading the love (and loot) to every corner we can reach.
Q: My package is marked as delivered, but I can't find it. What now?
A: Don't panic! Check with your household first. If it's still missing, contact your local USPS with the delivery confirmation number. They can use geolocation to track it down. If it's a neighborly mix-up, it usually gets resolved in a day or two.
🔄 Returns
Q: I received the wrong item. What should I do?
A: Our bad! If we've sent you the wrong item, we'll cover all costs to set things right. This kind of mix-up is rare, but we're here to fix it swiftly.
Q: What if I don't like the item I received?
A: No worries! You can return unused items, but there will be a restocking fee to cover our shipping costs. Please include all original packaging and tags.
📬 Contact Us
Got more questions? Our communication portals are open! Contact us here, and Nicholas (our resident nerd-in-chief) will get back to you within 24 hours, unless he's off embracing his inner geek at a convention. We promise a response faster than a warp drive activation!
🤔 Other Questions
No One: What are your favorite pirate jokes?
A: I thought you would never ask!
Everyone: We didn't! Don't do it, Nicholas!
A: We'll do a mixture of jokes with the drawn out "R" and plain ol' good bad dad jokes.
Everyone: We hate you! We're going to stop reading and start shopping.
A: Why are pirates, pirates? Because they arrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr!
A: What has 8 arms, 8 lets and 8 eyes? 8 pirates!
A. What did the pirate say when he went on Wheel of Fortune? I'd like to buy an eye!
A: What kind of socks to pirates wear? Arrrrrrgyle (and also "crew" socks from Nerd Imports) That's right bad jokes AND merchandise plugs at no extra cost to you!
A: What did the ocean say to the pirate captain? Nothing it just waved.
A: What is a pirates favorite letter? You might think it's R, but it's the C they are in love with.
A: What is a pirates backup occupation? Arrrrrchitect.
A: What do you call a pirate with 2 eyes, 2 legs and 2 arms? A rookie!
A: What happened to Red Beard the pirate when he fell into the blue sea? He got marooned!
A: Here's something they forget about at renaissance faires during pirate week: Pirates used to carry a bar of soap on their belt. That way if they were knocked overboard they could wash themselves ashore!
Everyone: I can't believe you're still doing these jokes!
A: But that's not all! You see when they wash themselves ashore, they won't go hungry there because of all the sandwiches there (sand which is there).
A: How much did the pirate pay for her haircut? A buccaneer! It's also worth noting that a buck an ear is a high price to pay for corn.
A: Did you hear about the pirate ship I just bought? It was on sail!
A: It was a model sea (Tesla jokes too).
| Nassau | Apple | $3.99 |
|
Kingston |
Cherry | $4.29 |
|
Port-au-Prince |
Cream | $3.75 |
These are the pie rates of the Caribbean.
A: 3.14% of sailors are pi-rates.
